Monday, January 17, 2011

Blogging my heart out

Readers that have been here a while know, that this is my outlet. When I'm at my saddest I let it out. But now I'm angry and I need to let it out. That and I have a 2.5 hour wait for my train and it's cold and snowy in the city so no Chicago shopping for this kid right now. And I feel like I'm about to boil over so I found some wifi and and am just going to get it out. I'm hurt and sad and angry. Hurt because I was promised we'd always be best friends. No matter what. Angry because then I got shut out. Ex-communicated, treated like an undesirable. Sad because I lost one of the best friends I ever had. That hurt more than anything. Seriously, more than anything. I feel defeated because I tried and was just shot down and shut out every time when all I wanted was your friendship. I am happy for you, I want you to have a happy long life, just as I hope you want the same for me. There really isn't a lot else to say. This isn't magically going to get better overnight. I've put myself out there only to get rejected and hurt one too many times to just forgive and forget. If it's important to you like it is to me, we'll work through it somehow. If not, then I wish you all the best.




P.S. I miss my dogs more than anything in the world.

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