Just over a year ago I wrote this post . Kind of crazy that just 360 some odd days ago I was in that place. Scared of my new apartment, scared of being on my own. Scared of life in general. I was so convinced that the world was going to come crashing down on me even more than it already had. How that would have been possible I don't know, but I couldn't shake the feeling of impending doom. Not surprisingly enough, just a year ago was the last panic attack I've ever had. At the time I figured it was the first of many to come, since I was so sure that I couldn't take care of myself, that I would never ever make it on my own. I didn't know how. I was 25 years old and had never had to live a moment of my adult life on my own. Seems pathetic actually putting it in writing. Obviously a lot has happened in this past year, way more than I ever thought would. To be honest when I first moved out of the house and into my home (see what I did there?) my thought was that I would find someone new and basically repeat the cycle. The next year I'd be blogging from my new home with my new bf. I don't know why I thought that. I don't know if it's because I felt that I had to prove how awesome I am, like how could someone not want me as their girlfriend?
As it turns out, I wasn't so interested in being anyone's girlfriend. I hate to be all teen movie, who am I, what is the meaning of life? But this year has been one of learning and dare I say, self discovery. Please note I want to punch myself in the face for saying that and trying to sound artsy and deep. In all honesty though, it's been an adventure, I know exactly who I am, what I want, and most of all I love sharing every single ridiculous moment of it with all of you.
Can't wait to see what I reflect on next year. Most likely some outrageous shenanigan. However I've declared summer 2011 married guy free. And well every summer....and every other season too.